Prologue - Cocoa/Transcript


 * ''The following transcript is taken from ameliapodcast.com/transcripts. It it has been uploaded here for documentation purposes and formatted for better viewing on this wiki.

(SOUND OF TWO CUPS BEING POURED. CLINK OF PORCELAIN. SOUNDS OF SLURPING BY APPROXIMATELY TWO PEOPLE)

INTERVIEWER: (SATISFIED SIGH) Ahhhh!

ALVINA: Ahhhh!

INTERVIEWER: Cocoa from Les Deux Magots. The epitome of bliss, the pinnacle of creation, the- (ALVINA INTERRUPTS HIM)

ALVINA: (CALMLY) We're down to our last thermos.

INTERVIEWER: (SHOCKED, UPSET) What? Impossible! Put in an order to Paris right away! Chop chop, vite vite! Delivery takes ten hours at least! What are you waiting-

(ALVINA INTERRUPTS HIM AGAIN)

ALVINA: No.

INTERVIEWER: (CONFUSED) No?

ALVINA: No. We haven't had any new clients in over a month. Until business picks up we have to tighten our belts.

INTERVIEWER: (GRAVE VOICE) But I can't work without cocoa!

ALVINA: You're not working. Not at the moment.

INTERVIEWER: (UPSET) Because we haven't had any clients!

ALVINA: (EQUALLY UPSET) Because you turned them all down!

INTERVIEWER: (FRUSTRATED) But they were so boring!

ALVINA: It can't be Jimmy Hoffa and D.B Cooper every day!

INTERVIEWER: Making people disappear is an art!

ALVINA: Yeah. I'm just saying, it can't be parachutes and plane hijackings all the time. We have to take on some good old bread and butter disappearances to keep the lights on around here.

(SCOFFS)

Or, in our case, to keep the cocoa flowing.

INTERVIEWER: Okay. Next client who contacts us, I'll take on their case.

ALVINA: You promise?

INTERVIEWER: I promise.

(DEADLY SERIOUS) Now give me the last of that cocoa.

(TELEPHONE RINGS, KEEPS RINGING)

ALVINA: Ha! It looks like we have a client...

(THE RINGING OF THE TELEPHONE FADES INTO MUSIC)